Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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