I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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