Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
