yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
My vagina just recognized that song.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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