It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
