I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
