Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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