a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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