I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
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