hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
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I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
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Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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