I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
