He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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