I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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