Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
