Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
