What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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