my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
