After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
