She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Randomize
