So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
