Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
