I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize