Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
This is my gift to your gina
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
