You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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