Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Panties = found
Randomize