im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize