doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
