she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
