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Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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