alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
