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  • Submitted by TheRuleBook on Aug 13, 10 at 9:28am

    Rule 649: Marry the one willing to swallow. Always.

  • Submitted by Valkyrie on Aug 13, 10 at 10:15am

    oh yeah. totally stealing that line : )

  • Submitted by K66Aggression on Aug 13, 10 at 10:13am

    she wants to have your babies, down her throat

  • Submitted by inflamessoilwork on Aug 13, 10 at 9:34am

    How is this a bad night? At all?

    • 47 56
      Submitted by instantwinner on Sep 10, 10 at 4:26pm

      I want to like this post, because i totally agree that this could not POSSIBLY be a bad night but I also don't want to ruin the iconic 69 likes this comment has!

  • Submitted by hooah33 on Aug 13, 10 at 9:49am

    "yes ma'am"...*zzzzip*

  • Submitted by ProductPlacemnt on Aug 13, 10 at 9:33am

    @lacrossedude4. Even tho TheRuleBook misses more than he hits, leave the job to him.

  • Submitted by rustybucket on Aug 13, 10 at 9:42am

    That is probably the greatest line ever used in the history of the world!!

  • Submitted by Glazed on Aug 13, 10 at 11:44am

    The best 12 words ever spoken.

  • Submitted by stillhungover on Aug 13, 10 at 10:32am

    Congratulations, you found a woman that's more of a man than you are.

  • 82 66
    Submitted by MoonStar on Aug 14, 10 at 12:47am

    I <3 swallowing. :) And sucking dick.

  • 89 83
    Submitted by jojoboo1 on Aug 13, 10 at 9:57am

    I loved this text except for the 'she tossed me in the back of the car'. OP sounds like a man of small stature and as someone famous once said "I don't like no short short man". j/s

  • 85 83
    Submitted by STD on Aug 13, 10 at 11:01am

    Hey lacrossedude, your WAY off. Not funny. Quit stealing rulebooks thunder.

  • 76 69
    Submitted by guitar_boy on Aug 13, 10 at 2:35pm

    I'm telling you, church chicks are freaks!

  • 78 76
    Submitted by cheesegoat on Aug 13, 10 at 3:35pm

    Who voted this a bad night?

  • 68 60
    Submitted by boopers on Aug 14, 10 at 8:49pm

    I love to swallow!

  • 75 77
    Submitted by Megzii on Aug 16, 10 at 12:16pm

    Totally the most epic thing I've ever heard.

  • 61 54
    Submitted by iKillFirstPeople on Aug 13, 10 at 9:28pm

    legend....

  • 71 75
    Submitted by BurritoIdol on Aug 13, 10 at 10:40pm

    Let there be white, in her throat.

  • 65 63
    Submitted by dd32 on Aug 13, 10 at 9:38am

    Success

  • 60 62
    Submitted by EmmaXxX on Aug 13, 10 at 1:56pm

    Yay swallow! :D

  • 64 72
    Submitted by rstgermaine on Aug 17, 10 at 2:06pm

    Where do all the ones like this hide?

  • 61 66
    Submitted by juicy465 on Aug 13, 10 at 8:07pm

    ITS NOT TALKING ABOUT VAMPIRES. ITS TALKING ABOUT SUCKING DICK IDIOT! sperm makes babies which equals life.

  • 54 60
    Submitted by jasesoul on Aug 19, 10 at 6:54pm

    She threw you? How is that possible?

    • 49 61
      Submitted by Attica on Mar 17, 11 at 8:33pm

      its not difficult if the person isn't weak..he didn't say she picked him up. She probably just pushed him forcefully

  • 47 49
    Submitted by PeepsCallMeGay on Aug 21, 10 at 11:49pm

    This text gave me a boner

  • 59 74
    Submitted by unknown13579 on Aug 13, 10 at 3:21pm

    Lacrossedude. You're a fa g

  • 54 66
    Submitted by spearchucker on Aug 15, 10 at 6:55pm

    That's awesome

  • Submitted by Imhornyletsfuk on Aug 13, 10 at 9:49am

    What a woman, that gave me a boner!

    • 42 83
      Submitted by barfbagbeauty on Aug 13, 10 at 12:13pm

      Annnd this is why 12 year olds should not be allowed on TFLN

  • 64 93
    Submitted by gkelly on Aug 13, 10 at 9:32am

    this makes me proud to be a 914

  • 56 78
    Submitted by KaylaFoyt on Aug 13, 10 at 9:26am

    Nice!

  • 52 71
    Submitted by Jfink30 on Aug 19, 10 at 9:45am

    Nice!

  • 31 36
    Submitted by KELSiii on Oct 9, 11 at 2:44pm

    Tossed you? I would never fuck a man that I could toss

  • 45 72
    Submitted by megadz on Aug 31, 10 at 10:28pm

    Leave it to westchester girls

  • 50 84
    Submitted by shadyj1 on Aug 14, 10 at 3:22pm

    Ms Kim?

  • Submitted by kindiana on Aug 13, 10 at 4:15pm

    Damned vampires.

  • 44 89
    Submitted by georgiadog73 on Aug 20, 10 at 7:43pm

    Hey Valkyrie csll me

  • 20 44
    Submitted by  on May 25, 12 at 4:42pm

    Inconceivable!

  • Submitted by LacrosseDude4 on Aug 13, 10 at 9:25am

    Rule: No matter what it is, someone will want to swallow it.