Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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