is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Randomize