i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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