She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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