Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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