There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
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"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
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