a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
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Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
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my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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