Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
