Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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