so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
