If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
