That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
