I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize