grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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