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  • yay for curdled yeast infections

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:15pm
  • anal chocolate ice cream

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:26pm
  • wow.. ice cream out of a strippers vag? BAD idea lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:07pm
  • dont know what you guy are talking about, that's the best way to eat ice cream! justtttt kidding.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:10pm
  • am i really the first person to wonder what the stripper was doing with ice cream IN her vag in the first place? does she walk around like that just in case or was it a special occasion??

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 9:10pm
  • hey boys i can take about 8 cocks in my mouth another 6 in my vagina. seen anyone more talented? i dont think so

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 1:35am
  • Isn't getting sugary stuff in on or near your vag bad because it causes infections?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 4:23pm
  • id like a scoop of herpes with chocolate jimmies.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 2:12pm
  • Have fun with the chlamydia!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 6:22am
  • Is there a way I can unread this thread? I'll continue to read to find out the answer.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 5:00pm
  • great fuckin line drop 430, hangover

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:44pm
  • actually 3:13 this text really wasn't funny at all.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:28pm
  • neopolitan...steer clear of the double fudge brownie

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:13pm
  • 1 646 285 4771 CALL HIM AND TELL HIM WHAT A FUCKING DOUCHEBAG HE IS

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 11:28pm
  • pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven, thats the difference betwen jews and pizza

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:38pm
  • that has to hurt It's like holding ice cubes to your crotch. Not that I've ever tried it, but it's not exactly pleasant.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 18, 09 at 4:55pm
  • Where can I eat ice cream

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 10:55pm
  • I hope it wasn't strawberry!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 8:24pm
  • 4:35, YES. Pineapple Express: "You wanted to eat that lollipop out of the hooker's snatch, you wanted to do it!" / "Yeah, and what'd you do? Ate a box of Nerds out of her butthole!!!"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:40pm
  • Nazi land is awesome. You can camp there if you want to stay the night.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:41pm
  • FUCK THIS UNKNOWN ERROR BULLSHIT

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 2:42am
  • 11:28- why do you have to be a bitch??? put someones number on a web site so random people could call him??? really???

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 12:49am
  • Doesn't that make you wonder why you still hang out with him? And 3:02, NO ONE FUCKING CARES. Learn how to spell first.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:03pm
  • the site should have like and dislike options

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 8:38pm
  • 3:10 is awesome, lay off. he's just expressing himself. freedom of speech bitches. go back to nazi land you nazi freaks

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:19pm
  • 4:23 not if you're hygienic try it it's fun

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 17, 09 at 6:15am
  • Heck, at least it wasn't frozen YOGURT!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 5:53pm
  • I shoot jelly beans out of mine

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 21, 09 at 3:35am
  • hahahahahahaahhahaha holy shit 341 #1, that is awful....and people, he might be proud of it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:59pm
  • Haha 3:19 (2) so people who disagree with 3:10 (2) are Nazis? Fuck you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 2:43am
  • How many jews can fit in a Honda civic? Maybe 4-5 in the seats and then an extra fifty in the ash tray.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:35pm
  • fuck everyone who thinks their opinion matters

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 2:55am
  • I don't see how Nazis and all the killing is humorous to all you assholes

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:23pm
  • "go back to nazi land you nazi freaks" ....Oh, 3:19. You are in desperate need of a life.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:29pm
  • holy shit that's hilarious. Get your buddies drunk in vegas.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 10:41pm
  • landing on the moon and dinos

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:35pm
  • never thought i'd be on a boat, its a big blue watery road. poseidon look at me

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:33pm
  • 4:40 - you sound like my kind of person

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:42pm
  • i am not sure what kind of strippers you all are going to see but the ones i know are high class and squeeky clean. i would not hesitate to eat ice cream off one of their monkey bumps.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:39pm
  • Love the Hangover drop!! Awesome!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 7:15pm
  • kinda reminds me of pineapple express

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:38pm
  • this isn't a tfln, its just a regular text.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:10pm
  • 435, the jokes supposed to be a VW not a honda. ya know. cause the germans make them.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 10:14pm
  • 3.19 from a song Belsen is a gas , so the people say, round up all the jews and take them all away, life is so much fun, wish you were here, write it on a ostcard and write it clear....stfu about nazi land you dozy twunt

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:12pm
  • that makes you feel better?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 17, 09 at 11:36am
  • banana vaginanananananana

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 8:26pm
  • ben and jerry's ...here is your chance for a new one....pussalicious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 9:21pm
  • 4:23, cheer the fuck up. The world is a big, shitty place, and you can really only do one of two things. You can cry at it, and then you'll never stop, or you can take things less seriously and crack jokes to alleviate the utter crushing pointlessness of it all.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:40pm
  • that makes him a pimp and you dumb

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 1:52am
  • the Holocaust never happened. it was created by the government to keep us in line and scare our children

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:34pm
  • this site's system should disallow shit heads' posts containing the letters f i r s t

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:03pm
  • I'm on a dolphin doin flips n shit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 1:37am
  • So the 'he' in said texts wins x 2? I don't get it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:29pm
  • as long as it is bacon flavoured ice cream he wins

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 11:39pm
  • I didn't know they gave rings out in the holocaust

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:30pm
  • At first it sounds awesome, but then u realize that he's gone to where a lot of other people have been too . =P -----> o_0 yuck

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 5:19am
  • 5:00 - what has been seen cannot be unseen. sorry.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 5:50pm
  • It's usually whipped cream.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 20, 09 at 5:02pm
  • you would eat ice cream out of a strippers vagina? eww. all strippers are trashy hoes

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:41pm
  • You should remind him of it too, that'd shut him up real fast.

    Submitted by yewinnhard on Apr 26, 12 at 7:08pm
  • She's a stripper, 9:10. I bet there have been many, many, objects in her vagina.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 9:14pm
  • Nazi land = Auschwitz (but with a smile)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:00pm
  • i hope the copy and paste people die, slowly

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 5:00pm
  • Nazi land...the trains there are always so crowded and a bunch of big holes are being dug...I wonder if they are putting in new rides?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:05pm
  • 3:39 is a stripper, or his mom/girl friend is

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:43pm
  • PINEAPPLE EXPRESS! Ahh I trying to remember where I heard someting like this before. Thanks 4:38 #2.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:17pm
  • 3:02 you ate ice cream out of a stripper's asshole

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:03pm
  • what flavor of stripper/ice cream? This makes all the differenc in the world.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:03pm
  • "nazi Land" is that an amusement park???

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:36pm
  • Yes 3:10 (2) we realize that this site has deviated from "Texts from last night" to "Funny texts that I happened to send or receive". However, it is still funny so STFU

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:13pm
  • maybe 3:39 is a she...or maybe they were just making a joke. anyone ever heard of sarcasm?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:46pm
  • those aren't bunny tracks................there herps scabs!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:32pm
  • i'm flippin burgers you at kinko's straight flippin copies..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 9:37pm
  • this aint sea world, this as real as it gets!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 12:07am
  • nazi land is ok, but the showers smell like death and the food sucks

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:02pm
  • i've never had a herpes sundae. how did he like it?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:03pm
  • haven't we all been there before?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:39pm
  • 2:19 your a dumbass, have you ever heard of sarcasm.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 2:15pm
  • I thank the jews for being able to finance movies and tv shows....they own hollywood and it scares the shit out of me

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:43pm
  • Ha ha, vagilla ice cream.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:19pm