Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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