summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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