your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize