loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
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