Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
