Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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